What am I good at?

I was thinking about this yesterday- it's something we ask at work "What are you good at?" and expect an immediate response.
I thought about this for a good 30 minutes and only concluded that I am very good at eating cupcakes.

I know what I'm not good at (Cooking, Driving, french plaits, drawing... That list seemed endless!)
But identifying what I can do well turned out to be pretty hard.
I think that sometimes you can't see what your skills or talents are because they're often things you do all the time- it's only when you see someone else struggle with it or just learning to do it you realise how far you've come.
And I suspect that most people are intrinsically modest. We're brought up not to "boast" or "show off".

Then I started to think about what my friends are good at- That was pretty easy! I did this for about 20 people but I'm just going to post a few of them here.

Traff: He can sleep anywhere, any time in any position- that is a talent of his I have always envied, He's really bendy and has awesome balance so is immediately brilliant at yoga, paddle boarding, gymnastics and almost every sport, He's organised and really self motivated, He makes the best home made pizza I've ever eaten. He also makes an awesome Spag bol. He's always calm and happy, nothing ever phases him at all. He knows all the facts about football and 90s bands- he just seems to be able to remember facts! He's much better at english than I am, in fact he's probably much cleverer than I am all round, he has really good taste in books, He always finds obscure documentaries for us to watch, he always looks effortlessly cool- I wish I could look so good with so little effort. He's funny, Charming, affable and everyone loves him immediately- this leads to him always landing on his feet.

Kirstie: She always knows exactly the right thing to say, She's get a really good eye for pattern clashing and always managed to be on trend, Amazing ability to walk in high heels, Flawless make up (She taught me how to apply eyeliner when I was about 13),Creative, Really good dress maker, Dedicated to her causes, Self motivated enough to go take loads of exercise, She gives brilliant advice (I just need to be better at acting on it because I know she's right), Awesome taste in unusual films (I loved Ghost town), Amazing baker- no-one else makes a better cake or has persuaded me to eat a grape salad. Maths Guru. Plans the best days out.

Abi: Always has perfect hair. I wish I could make my hair look effortlessly styled like she does, She can wear whatever she likes and she makes it look awesome, She's creative, good at drawing, arty and writes really good letters. She also writes really awesome papers- Whenever I've read her academic work I've been impressed. She loves Frida Khalo as much as I do but can explain her art to me, She always reads really interesting non fiction books for her research which I always ask to borrow. She makes spaces her own in a way I never could. She plays an aggressive game of monopoly deal!

Hayley: Is super creative and crafty, she's got a really good eye for colours and how to put them together, Brilliant taste in vintage/retro clothes and always manages to make them look classy, She is a calm and patient listener. Always sees something good in everything and everyone. Always on the go looking for a new experience. She's an explorer! She always finds the best places to visit (Like the stone circle or the camp site) and she sends the best parcels (No more rocks through please- I hope you were joking about the brick!) She is always so calm and patient and kind, she looks after everyone. Excellent taste in cake and night clubs (Alcohol, flamethrowers and tattoos, what could possibly go wrong?!). Makes drug dealers leave us alone with her cheerful but firm tone of voice "No thank you, we don't want any Ketamine, we're going home".

Jay: Always gives really good advice, Is a brilliant drummer and guitarist and has awesome taste in music (He always has something new or different to show you or recommend). He's so easy going and happy to let other people take control (I really envy the ability to do that!). He's quick to learn new skills and easily inspired (- I was really impressed by the picnic bench you made, I wouldn't even know where to start!) He is easy going and can talk to anyone, he's charming and fascinating when he meets new people and they always love him immediately. He's always has time for people and enjoys peoples company- he never seems to run out of things to say. He has no fear! Whenever I go out on the bike with him I am simultaneously terrified and impressed.

Sah: Is always really calm, She's a problem solver and a peace keeper, She's a really calming influence because nothing ever gets to her, She's really reliable. She has really good taste in music (We like all the same bands), Knows her 80s films, always up for an adventure- especially if it's muddy. She always has time for everyone and is usually the first person to get on board with something (Night out/impromptu camping holiday/ house party). She always makes her point without ever upsetting anyone. She makes the best ham and cheese toastie I've ever eaten, and deals with fires really well (Flaming bacon? out of the kitchen window! Set fire to the flex for the kettle on the gas hob? turn it all off calmly whilst everyone else loses it) She just laughs at everything.

Soph: Is a brilliant baker- she makes the best mars bar cheese cake on the planet.

Ray: Is really quick witted with an amazing sense of humour, Really good at baking (especially Chocolate Torte), She's determined and just never gives up on anything, She can drive anything, Does an awesome BBQ, Has excellent taste in books- She always has a fiction book on the go and never has to resort to trashy chic lit, She's brilliant at drawing anime cartoons. She works really hard- She really is brilliant at her job because she makes it her point to be the best person in her office.

Then I got into a bit of an abstract chain of thought, I bet that if I asked those people to tell me what they're good at:
1) They probably wouldn't think of those things
2) How good you think someone is at something is -in terms of skills- measured against your own ability- you go to someone for help or advice with something because they're better than you, but they probably go to someone with an even greater skill set, so they probably don't realise how good they are at it!
3) In terms of admirable qualities, they would be relative to your relationship with that person- For example, I may find someone to be a good listener, because we know each other really well, where someone else might not find them so helpful.

So, I've concluded that what people think I'm good at probably wouldn't be what I could have identified.
And as the concept so difficult to define I'm just not going to worry about it.

I'll just assume the my friends, family and loves ones think I have some skills, talents and qualities in something.
I still have no idea what I'm actually good at and Analysing this any further makes my brain hurt, but it's been an interesting philosophical musing.

* Please don't be offended if I didn't list your skills, talents and qualities- Just ask, I give compliments for free.
Although, probably not anywhere near as often as I should or as people deserve.